I Got Stung!

Yesterday, for the first time in probably 15 years and likely only the 3rd time in my life, I got stung by a wasp. I admit – I said some dirty words. It hurt!  I mean HURT, like really really H-U-R-T!  Hence the reason I said some rather unladylike things. Then, an interesting series of things occurred on my arm where the sting happened:

* Almost immediately following the sting you couldn’t really see anything. Don’t get me wrong – there was pain but nothing outwardly to show the world that I deserved sympathy.

* About 10 minutes later I started to get a welp that grew to the size of a dime.

* 20 minutes in and the welp started to be surrounded by a small red blotch.

* About 45 minutes after getting stung, the welp was gone but the blotchy red patch increased to a strip about 6 inches long.  And the strip was hot and very sore to the touch. I took a picture on my phone and sent it to my entire family hoping to garner some sympathy. My family couldn’t have cared less. Apparently there needs to be the presence of blood for my family to give me any special attention. Cold-hearted heathens!

* About 2 hours later there was nothing. No indication whatsoever that I should be pampered and coddled. Well pooh. If you’re going to get injured at least you should be able to milk it for something, darn it!

* My arm was sore all evening but all looked perfectly normal.

* This morning when I awoke – almost 20 hours after I got stung – I had a red patch back on my arm. Not blotchy this time but slightly red. Oh – there was also one other small difference – it ITCHED LIKE ALL GET OUT!!!  I’m not severely allergic so yesterday when Hubby asked me if I had taken any Benadryl I said no, I didn’t think there was any need.   I’ve changed my mind. There’s definitely need. Any there’s also annoyance. Why would it be itchy almost 24 hours later??? I’ve decided it’s just to annoy me.

Jennifer

P.S. The song “Hot for Teacher” just came on the radio. I think it’s been 20 years since I’ve heard this song but I still vividly remember the video. Does that show my age?

THE best shredded cheese

I’ve realized a lot of the recipes I prepare include cheese. This really shouldn’t be surprising as it’s one of my most favorite things on the planet. We’ve always got cheese in one or five different forms in the fridge. One of our usual staples was always grated cheddar – usually sharp cheddar because we’re all about loads of flavor.

A few months ago I read on Pioneer Woman to please grate your own cheese and don’t use the pregrated stuff from the grocery. I scoffed a little and wondered how much better could it really be? Cheese is pretty darn good as it is! I also had to consider the pain in the rear end that using a box grater is. Who wants to stand there and do that???

Well, enter the Barefoot Contessa – Ina Garten. On her show, she mentioned using the food processor to grate cheese as needed.

Well, this was something I could get behind! The lovely freshness of grating your own cheese mixed with the laziness of just pushing a button to accomplish it?  This has my name written all over it!  Here’s how it’s done:

First determine how much cheese you want to grate. If you need a specific amount, you can use a kitchen scale like this:

For my recipe I needed 8 ounces so I got out exactly what I needed.

Then, find the grater blade for the food processor. It will look like this:

Cut the cheese in chunks large enough to fit in the shoot but keep them as big as you can to make sure you are able to grate all the cheese. Shove it down the shoot and use the block press to smush it down to the blade while holding the pulse button, like this:

After about 15 seconds, you will end up with a lovely bowl of cheesy goodness:

YUMMY!!!  Now, we only buy block cheese which is WAY less expensive per pound than the pregrated stuff. And, Pioneer Woman was right. The texture is much more creamy and doesn’t have that “chalky” residue like pregrated stuff and the flavor is much more intense. I bet if you tried it you’ll never go back :)

Jennifer

Creamy Mac & Beef Recipe

This one should probably be called “Homemade Hamburger Helper” because that’s basically what it is. However, the taste of this creation is far and away better than anything you can get in a box so I’m sticking with the “Creamy Mac & Beef” name.  I didn’t make this recipe up but got it from Kraft.com but here it is, along with my revisions because you know I can’t just follow a recipe exactly:

INGREDIENTS:

1 lb ground beef
2 (14.5 oz) cans beef broth
1 cup water
8 oz elbow macaroni (2 cups)
1 (12 oz) can evaporated milk
1/4 cup Cheez-Whiz
8 oz Shredded Sharp Cheddar Cheese

Note, the original recipe called for only one can of beef broth but after about 4 minutes my noodles had absorbed all the liquid and it’s pretty hard to boil noodles if you ain’t got not liquid. I only had chicken stock so I added about one additional cup of that and it worked out fine but next time I’ll just start with 2 cans and make it easier on myself.

STEPS:

Preheat large sauté pan (or electric skillet) on medium-high 2–3 minutes.

Place ground beef in pan & cook 5–7 minutes, stirring to crumble meat until beef is brown and no pink remains.

Stir in broth, water, and macaroni

Bring to a boil

Cook 10–12 minutes, stirring occasionally, or until liquid is mostly absorbed and macaroni is soft and tender.

Stir evaporated milk into pasta and add salt & pepper to taste

Remove from heat (or turn heat off). Add grated cheese

Add Cheeze-Whiz

Stir until creamy

Note – it will look “soupy”. Let it set while you’re setting the dinner table – about 5 to 10 minutes and it will thicken up nicely until it looks like this:

Very easy, pretty simple dinner for a busy week night.  Hubby and I had left-overs for lunch the next day and it was even better than the night I cooked it.

Oh, and in case you’re wondering, no – not all my recipes include Cheeze-Whiz. Actually only two things I cook have it in them, I just happened to post both of those recipes.

Jennifer

Who Cares?

Am I the only person who simply doesn’t give a hoot about Charlie Sheen? I don’t watch the show Two and a Half Men and I find Charlie to be a poor example of what an adult male should be. Yes, he’s gone off the deep end. Is anyone really surprised about this? He’s been on drugs for decades. Was there anyone out there who thought he wouldn’t go off the deep end eventually?

I have avoided reading the many, many, many headlines about his stunts and rants. I just don’t care what he has to say and have no interest in reading any of it. I wonder how the producers of his show thought they could actually avoid this happening eventually. When you hire someone who’s a known rake you get what you get.

Also, on the list of people I don’t care to see, hear or read about:

  • Lady Gaga
  • Britney Spears
  • Jude Law
  • Madonna
  • Alex Rodriguez
  • Megan Fox
  • Tom Cruise
  • Christian Bale

It’s not that I wish them harm – I really don’t.   I just don’t care to hear about their latest antic every single time I turn on the tv, open a magazine or get on the web.

Am I alone?

 

A new post…

Laundry Post

Yes, there really is a new post. It’s just not on this blog. Well, technically this is a new post but since I’m just directing you to another blog I don’t think it really counts all that much.

However, if you’ve ever hated laundry and felt like it was stalking you and trying to make you crazy, I invite you to click on that little ol’ link above to read a “highlarious” post from one of my favorite bloggers, April the chicken doctor.

You’re welcome :)

Jennifer

 

New Recipe (for the dogs)

This may look like the beginning of another recipe post. There are ingredients above with which you are likely very familiar – KFC gravy and lunch meat for example. Looking past those – things may appear to diverge into the weird with things like fish oil and jack mackerel.

What you are seeing is not something I’m preparing for my lunch. It is for dinner, however. It’s the hullabaloo we have to go through to feed our three dogs. Each of them need something slightly different – “real meat” frozen kibble for the little one (in the small reusable container on the left), prescription intestinal diet canned dog food for the big one and puppy chow kibble for the middle dog. The big one also gets the fish oil (for her joints), the arthritis medication and the pain medication (which helps her get around in the winter).

You would think all of the above would be enticing to the dogs and they would come running to eat. On the contrary, apparently our dogs get bored and we have to change things up in order to keep their interest. That’s where the gravy and the canned fish come into play. If you’ve never had the pleasure (blech) of being confronted with jack mackerel in person, let me explain what it’s like. It’s sort of like tuna but funkier. They leave the fish in large chunks with part of the skin still on and the odor – oh my the odor! It will permeate the entire room and the refrigerator and anything else with which it may come into contact. The dogs LOVE it. However, they will eventually get bored with this combination as well. Therefore, we will often mix things up with eggs (raw and cooked), canned pumpkin (for the fiber), baby food and various left over meats that I bring home if we eat dinner out some place.

Doesn’t this look yummy?

 

Beer Cheese Soup

There used to be a restaurant near me that served beer cheese soup in these little pewter bowls with handles. That soup was amazing. The place is closed now and I hadn’t had it in a couple years so I decided to alter my mom’s potato cheese soup recipe and see if I could make it just like 101st Airborne used to make it. I’ll take a bow now because I DID IT!!! If you ever  had the pleasure to eat their version and have missed it, I invite you to try mine and compare:

First assemble your ingredients:

* 1 stick real butter
* 2 cans chicken broth or 1 small box
* 1 small or 1/2 large sweet onion (only cut in half)
* 1 cup milk
* 3 tbs cornstarch
* 1 regular jar Cheez Whiz (yes really) (not the tiny or the tall one)
* 1/2 bottle pale beer (I like Heineken)
* salt & pepper

One thing about the Cheez Whiz. You may be tempted to get all fancy and use actual real cheese. DON’T! The Cheez Whiz melts nicely and adds a tangy zing (not “zip” – this ain’t no miracle whip commercial!) that really adds to the soup. Try it the way it’s written first and then you can change it up if you feel so inclined. But you’re a noodle head if you mess with this recipe so you’re forwarned!
Directions:

First, resist the urge to just drink the beer straight out of the bottle. You really do need it for the soup :)

In large stock pot (I use an enamel covered dutch oven), melt butter and add onion. Leave onion whole as you will remove it later. You can finely dice the onion and leave it in there but I don’t like the texture. Don’t skip the onion though as it adds a dimension of flavor that’s needed.

Once onion starts becoming translucent remove it and add chicken broth.

Next add the corn starch.

Make sure to whisk the cornstarch in well. Bring to a boil. This mixture will become thick.

Once thickened, add entire jar of Cheez whiz, milk and beer. Mix thoroughly. Pepper liberally – taste before adding any salt I don’t add much if any at all most times.

Simmer for 15 minutes.

Enjoy with a panini pressed sandwich and the rest of the beer :)

You can change this recipe slightly and turn it into Potato Bacon soup easily by decreasing the butter to 2 tbsp, finely dice the onion, add 4 medium potatoes peeled and diced small and add 2 oz. bacon pieces or 2 slices bacon.

Saute’ onion and bacon in butter. Add potatoes and chicken broth. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat & simmer for 15 minutes or until potatoes are tender. Stir in milk, Cheez Whiz and pepper. Simmer over low heat until soup is melted completely.

This is really a lovely easy dinner for a cold winter’s day. enjoy!

Stupid Dog Shoes

No, this post isn’t about dogs so stupid that they require shoes.  It is about stupid looking dog shoes. Upon further thought, is there a possibility of a dog shoe that doesn’t look stupid? I digress…

We have a very old Golden Retriever. She has arthritis and has a hard time getting around on the floors in our house because they are slick and we have no carpet.  We really struggled with what to do about it until we found these gems:

 

They’re actually made for dogs to wear in the snow to protect the pads of their feet from de-icing agents and from snow getting packed into their paws. They’re made of this stuff that’s sort of like a wetsuit.

This is our dog wearing them and wondering why I’m taking her picture. They work GREAT! They give her traction on the floor to prevent falling and they enable her to get up from a laying position without help. Oh, and one more thing…

they look really stupid.

 

Fireplace Too Hot To Hang a TV?

How do you tell if it’s safe to hang a tv over your fireplace? Well, you could try doing this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I will admit, I didn’t come up with the ingenious idea of hanging a thermometer over your fireplace (where the bottom of the tv will be) and then build a ROARING fire and see how hot the temperature actually gets. Make sure to let the coals get nice and hot as well – that raised the temperature way more than how big the flames got. And it took several hours to reach maximum heat so make sure you keep it going long enough to get an accurate read out.  Then, get the owner’s manual of the tv and look up the maximum safe operating temperature. If you’re under that, you’re golden! Well, that is if your wires will be exposed like ours will. If your wires will be hidden in the wall – I have no idea :)

Also, please check back over the next couple weeks.  There’s a MAJOR renovation project underway at my house and I’m taking before and after shots because you’ve got to see this one to believe it. We’re almost done so be sure to come back and check it out!

No more 60lb tumor?!?!

I think I’ve mentioned before my adoration, addiction, love, etc of the Discovery Health Channel. Their programming speaks to my idiosyncratic obscure mindset. I can’t tell you how many programs I have been sucked into watching and have come away with an awe of what people can live with and through. Some of the shows that have amazed me have been:

(apologies as I’m sure these are not the titles)…

Lady with the 60-lb tumor

Man with half a body

Lady with half a body who had a baby

Living with proteus syndrome

Intersexed (formerly hermaphroditism)

My unborn twin

Conjoined twins

Children with Progeria

Children who’s skin sloughs off

Mermaid Girl

Treeman

Paralyzed and pregnant

These are all stories of people who make the most out of life and keep their chin up and keep on living despite their prognosis. Shows like this make me so thankful for the healthy blessed life I’ve been given and makes you not take things for granted.

WELL…

The new Oprah Winfrey network (OWN) has taken over the Discovery Health Channel!!!! Aaarrrrgggg!!!!! What am I going to do without this programming? Nobody else carries stuff like this! Where will I get my obscure health anomaly education? I’m going to give OWN a chance and hope that they’re going to keep this amazing programming but I’m not holding my breath!

Jennifer

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